Meh!

So - I ordered the navy eyelet as suggested by Carolyn and it's arrived. It's lovely - in it's protective plastic bag. I believe this is the most I've ever spent per yard on fabric and y'all know I'm chicken. I don't want to cut into it. To date - I have traced the pattern. That's it. What's the hold up? Besides fear? Well - my doctor asked me to lose a few pounds. So, I've been seriously counting calories and I'm slowly dropping. While I think if this dress fits in the bust and shoulders I won't have a problem with fit if I'm 20-30# less, but do I want to risk it? Do I want it to be a one season dress that won't fit when I'm down a few more pounds? I don't think so. I see this dress as being fun and quirky. Being able to wear it for quite a few seasons with different colored slip dresses under it. I can see white, lime green, and pink to name a few - what colors can you see under the navy blue? And what would you do about the weight loss issue? Wait? or Sew for the Body I'm living in Now? (For the record, I'm down just under 10# in 2 weeks.)

IRRATIONAL

That's how I've been feeling lately. There are lots of things that I know about losing weight - skip sugar, drink water, eat your fruits and veggies, exercise, blah, blah, blah. There are other things I know - such as when you start an exercise program (and you're working with a trainer who's goal is to make you work to your full potential), your body hurts. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's just plain painful. I also know that you might have a small weight gain at the beginning. Here's where the irrational comes in. I am a daily weigher - I know, throw the damn scale away! I also know that what I weigh this morning is absolutely no indicator of what I did yesterday. But still I step on the damn thing every morning. Well yesterday at my Weight Watchers weigh-in, I gained 3#. It was less than I thought it was going to be, however I still wasn't thrilled. So, I talked to my trainer about it last night while I was being tortured. I have agreed that while I'm going to continue going to Weight Watchers for while, I'm going to ask them not to tell me - for at least a month. To give everything time to work without my getting frustrated and sabotaging myself, as is my wont in life. I'm also going to attempt to get more protein in on a daily basis - this is hard for me, but I'll work on it. What makes you irrational?

If You Give a Girl

a fresh baked chocolate chip cookie with her morning coffee, she will eat it.

If you give a girl a fresh baked chocolate chip cookie with her morning coffee, she will eat it. She will then follow it by licorice allsorts - even though she really doesn't like licorice (but she likes these).

If you give a girl a fresh baked chocolate chip cookie with her morning coffee, followed by licorice allsorts, she will then snack the day away eating new Cheez-It Duoz. Then after she has a little after work pampering (fingers and toes) when JB calls and asks if she wants to meet him for dinner - she will go. She will then order her favorite and eat almost all of it.

However, I was good and only drank water and coffee all day. If you give a girl a day old chocolate chip cookie to photograph with her morning coffee for this post - watch out - she'll even eat that too!

2 weeks ago I went back to Weight Watchers. I did really well the first week. Then . . . this morning I will attend the meeting on my way to work (rather than skip - which is my old MO) but I will use a No Weigh pass and get myself back on track. I am better than day old cookies :)

Hard

No, not that finished knit - to be introduced and explained in detail later, but my life recently. I don't know why, I can't explain it, but life just seems hard lately. It's getting harder and harder to just get through the things that have to get done on a daily/weekly basis. You know - working, grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning. I am still knitting - but mostly because that seems to be an extension of my fingers when I sit down - it just happens without conscious thought. Part of this comes from my current weight and how much I let society and the images on the pages of magazines and television affect my personal self worth and how I think I should look. I have discussed this numerous time before and I don't really want to rehash it here - but the truth is that since I got sick last Fall I have let my weight creep back up and it is weighing me down. I know what I should do but I don't have the energy or the desire. Without losing the weight, I don't know how to get past this and get comfortable in my own skin. Any suggestions?

shuffle

Last year, my boss bought me a cute little pink apple iPod shuffle to listen to while on my treadmill. Until tonight I hadn't loaded it. The Musical One kept saying she would help me - but then nothing. After talking to my friend Y this week about her new iPod, I decided it was time to figure out how to load mine. It was pretty easy. The goal is that Monday's treadmill workout will go a little faster and maybe I won't be a focused on the 'track.' I'm looking forward to using this little puppy - should be fun to hear some of my old favorite music that I had bought on cd's but never listen to because the radio is always on at work and in my car :)

Dirty Little Secret - Part Deux

First, I want to thank everyone who commented on my first Dirty Little Secret post. I wish I had emails for everyone as I like to respond, but I don't so thank you. Last week I hit my wall again. The one where you know enough is enough already. I have decided not to spend all my time sitting in a chair (yes, I know that's a pincushion, but . . .) I think the biggest thing for anyone is to find what works for you. We all don't have a gym setup at home (I do and I'm lucky to have it so I should use it), we all don't have gym memberships, and frankly we all don't enjoy the same things. I don't swim! I know it's great exercise but I don't like it! So, this is what I have done. I have prepared JB, told him what I need and asked him for his help. He has agreed to get up 2 mornings a week and help me move the machine around, set weights and make sure my form is right. He followed through with his agreement this morning. I also bought a new WW journal and am using it! For me, working out in the early (5:15-5:30) morning is what works best for me. It gives me a good start to my day and rather working as damage control (I'll get on the treadmill to counteract what I ate today) it works instead as a motivator. I drink more water, I eat better, I take the 5 minutes to pack a lunch, and amazingly enough my house ends up cleaner because I have more energy. But I know that doesn't work for everyone. Last Summer sometime I was posting a weekly "Sunday Shape-Up" just to keep myself accountable. I believe I will start that again - however a blocked blog was started at that time (I'm sure it shows in my profile). If anyone is interested in joining that, please let me know. We can be our own best friends and supporters or we can be our own enemies. I need best friends, I need other woman who understand the feelings that accompany the weight. While I don't want to turn GMarie into a weight management blog - I will post what I need to to take care of me. Two things that have stuck with my from my last go round with Weight Watchers - 1. You can't give from empty (if you are always taking care of everyone else, will you have any energy left to take care of you?) and 2. Be Good to You (which is a really a line from the Julia Roberts, Richard Gere movie who's name escapes me). So, please tell me - what one small step will you do for yourself to "Be Good to You Today?"

Dirty Little Secret

At least that's what it feels like. Once again I have given up on myself. I'm finally starting to feel good again. I don't understand why it takes this long, but I just continue on.

Sometimes I feel like I'm climbing that mountain and I'm never going to reach the top.

This morning I attended a Weight Watchers meeting. The first since the beginning of January. My dirty little secret is that I have issues with food. When I'm stressed I eat - and not carrots! When I'm tired-I eat, when I'm hungry-I eat, when I'm sad-I eat -- do you see a pattern?

So this weekend I'm working on reminding myself that I'm worth it! That I deserve to take the time to take care of myself whether that's working out or cooking healthy meals. I cook most days of the week and I know that it's just as easy to cook healthy as it is to cook trash. Some days trash just tastes better.

So, I didn't want to spend this much time whining, but I wanted my friends to know that I'm making myself important in my life again and asking for your support on the next stage of this journey - getting back to goal.

What Am I Thinking?

I often wonder this about myself. I am addicted, repeat addicted, to sugar. I have to avoid it at all costs. I was doing really well early in my recovery process. Was down a few pounds, feeling great even wearing nothing but pajama pants. Then the neighbor brought by cookies - yummy! Then I attended the office Holiday party - more cookies, jelly bellies, alcohol - not good! After that I just spiraled out of control. Oatmeal and fruit for breakfast? I think not! I'd rather have cookies and fudge with a coffee chaser. Skip lunch - just grab another piece of fudge on the way to switch the laundry. The biggest problem has been going back to work. There is a huge ginger jar full of jelly beans at the office - well it was full, not so much anymore. Personally, since I seem to have absolutely no control, I'm ready to throw the damn things in the garbage, but . . . I guess I should be glad I managed to avoid the 4# box of See's Candies that was there. So even though on Tuesday I packed a lunch including an apple and 2 tangerines, my water bottle, soup and the iron I have to take daily - the only thing that has been consumed is the water and soup - not even an iron pill has crossed my lips! I hate taking them. Oh well, time to move past this and make better choices, including no jelly beans.

Sunday Shape Up

Okay - so yesterday while I blog surfing, I read in Sharon's blog that I was encouraging her to get out and walk more. Then this morning, I got a comment from Marji that she was interested in playing too (I couldn't find your email address anywhere). So, as soon as I get a little housework done and make an attempt to cool our un-airconditioned home, I'll figure out the little add your blog list I referenced in my Wanna Play post. Edited to Add - I found where you add the list thing, but I don't know how to make it work. So, since you all can't actually post on my blog, let's do this. You post your Sunday Shape Up on your own blog and leave a comment. I will check comments periodically on Sunday and update my post to link to your post. Will that work? Anyway, My thought is to have a Sunday Shape Up check in and I'll be happy to host it here. I don't really want another blog to maintain, but if Marji or Sharon are interested, I'll be happy to post there too. Finally, I thought we could list our steps per day (I haven't been wearing my pedo since early June, time to start again), any other steps you are taking to shape-up (I plan on getting back on the Ball and Treadmill) and a weigh in if you wish to. Even if you don't want to post your weigh in to the public, I would suggest that you weigh in weekly (old weight watchers habits die hard). Okay - I'm off to take a cool shower, find a fan, then do some more laundry and head downstairs to the sewing room, where it is much cooler!!

It's Getting Easier

to keep my head in the weight management game. That is. Yesterday I was tired. I had sorta overdone it with the working out on Tuesday. I went to bed late on Tuesday night due to a series of unfortunate events - anyway, I slept late. so I didn't get a morning workout in. But I didn't add cream to my coffee and I had a yogurt and grapefruit (peeled and eaten like an orange) for breakfast. The Princess showed up at the office around noon and we took a 20 minute walk. Lunch was baby carrots and leftover Tamale casserole. By the time I finally left the office at 6 (I get off work at 4:30) I was almost in tears. The nice relaxing effect of the vacation is gone already. However - I did not sit down with JB and help him finish off the bag of chips with salsa. Instead I had a 2pt bar and big class of water. Dinner was baked fish, grilled butternut squash and a salad. I made sf/ff white chocolate pudding with frozen raspberries for dessert and got JB out to walk the big houndies. This morning saw me up on time, worked out and I took a nice, long (35 minutes or so) walk at lunchtime. Dinner tonight will be left over spaghetti with spinach & strawberries and hopefully an after dinner dog walk. Tomorrow is weigh in, our new roof is being delivered, my brother will be arriving sometime in the middle of the night, I will be working in the yard (on office work, not yard work) and sometime after that - this will return to a sewing blog. Speaking of which - I took the top for the pink dress upstairs with me last night. I left the right side open for the zipper, instead of the left. Anyway - I tried it on, the fit will be a little loose, but fine. The issue I was seeing is with a really, really crappy pressing job. So - literally - back to the ironing board I go!!!

Wanna Play?

So, yesterday I challenged Claire to walk 10,000 steps a day. Truly that is quite a bit. I'm not sure I'll be able to make it right off the bat! But then I remember the comments from last week and the support and others that are in the same boat - struggling with stay on track, forgetting to put themselves first - and I thought why not have a bunch of people play? So, who wants to join us? Randi had some blog posts on her lets get real monday topic that would let you add links of all the people playing. I would be willing to figure that out and have a weekly check-in. On the sewing related front - have you seen what the 3 bloggers on sewing vacation have been churning out? Go check them out - Carolyn is one of those on vacation and she's managed to produce 2 dresses and a jacket. That Jacket by the way is the one I have planned for the Jacket that Carolyn challenged me to make - it's been put aside until end of Summer/Fall sewing as I found a beautiful pink home dec fabric to make it out of. I will meet this challenge - just not before she gets it made. Of course, the other side of the challenge was that Carolyn make a Marfy! Linda (Danvillegirl) is also on vacation. She is in search of the perfect empire waist dress. She may have found it. Go check! Now! Finally, Sharon is on vacation. On top of helping her hubby with a honey-do list a mile long - she's managing to get a lot of sewing done! Personally - I got the polka-dot skirt attached to the top. I also managed to get the white ironed. This morning's 10-20-30 minutes of sewing will hopefully see the white skirt pieces cut and serged. Then tonight - assemble, insert zipper, and finish the last of the hand stitching. I'm starting to get tired of this dress and I'm second guessing my fabric choice. It was a very inexpensive piece of fabric from JoAnn's. Guess I'll have to wait to see once it's finished if it's going to work. If not, I learned some new things and tried a few new things too! Last weekend at the Memorial Day Sales I picked up the following patterns - all for .99 each! I made JoAnn's match the Hancocks .99 price and saved myself a trip :) First I got S4076 - I have seen this top on Claire in person and I love it! I really like the cross over version as well as the scoop neck top. I also picked up the Thread S3744, but no pictures anywhere. I saw this cute little pattern, and while the top is extremely similar to the pattern above, I like the raglan sleeve option as well as the knit dress. It may be time to finally break down and order some fabrics from Gorgeous Things or Marsha. Finally - 2 from McCalls. First up - M5430. I have wanted a true wrap skirt for years. I love the cascading ruffle where the front overlaps. The second pattern - M5434 - I'm loving option B, D, E the wrap jacket, skirt & top. Again - need to shop for high quality knits with great recovery.

What a Difference a Day Makes

So, last night I fixed a Weight Watchers Tamale Casserole for dinner - I loaded up on the veggies. Yummy. While that was in the oven baking - I did a 25 minute weight workout. This morning - After having cottage cheese and cantaloupe for breakfast, I worked on the pink dress. Most of the godets are now successfully installed in their seams! But before that - I plugged in a 20 minute ab routine. Killer! For lunch - salad with ff feta, avocado, & artichokes. Plus a banana. Dinner tonight will either be spaghetti (if JB feels up to cooking) or fish, baked butternut squash & spinach salad. I also plan on logging some miles on the treadmill with a good book - slow and steady. I found out I can walk at a steady pace of 3.4MPH and read at the same time. I keep the incline up around 4.5. Also - if there's time before sewing with House, I might to try to get a little dog walk in. Claire - do you have a pedometer? I would like to issue a daily challenge to get 10,000 steps in, beginning June 1 - you game? Oh, and I know this is a sewing blog - I just need to post weight management issue for a bit and get back on track. Unfortunately - as is the way of life, the current weight management issues affect my ability to sew or even want to. I'll try not to let it take over, though.

One of Those Days!

I'm having a day like the Fiber Fanatic. Well not quite as bad as hers, I have enough fabric. But everything I touch all day has gone wrong! Let me start at the beginning of the weekend. Thank you all for your comments and support on my weight management issues. I pulled myself up by my bootstraps and went to a Weight Watchers meeting on Saturday morning. I was 3# over goal. I bought a couple of packages of 2 point bars and a new cookbook. I was discussing my frustration with the receptionist (who is also a leader) when an older woman came up and started telling us that we were extremely rude! That if I needed to talk to her, then I needed to make an appointment! Well I told the leader that I would stay for the meeting, but I refused to let crabbies rain on my weekend! I then headed over the JoAnns for the Memorial Day Weekend Sale. I got 4 new patterns - 2 Simplicity, and 2 McCalls (with Hancocks .99 price matching!). I also picked up a really cute piece of pique and 2 coordinating prints for another skirt. Then I headed into the office to catch up from being gone on vacation and then this coming week being a short week too! Ran a few errands to get ready for Poker Night in Bothell and then went home. The Musical One and I went through my book series that I read and keep. She helped me figure out which ones were missing. I surfed the net, played with the dogs, and did a little bit of housework. I feel asleep on the love seat around 10 waiting for poker peeps to go home! Well I was watching Veronica Mars with The Musical One and her friend. Veronica Mars strikes me as a Nancy Drew type character. I may have to borrow the Musical One's DVDs and watch the series. Anyway - Sunday JB was sick! And I mean sick, fever, body aches, cough, plugged head - you name it. I made oatmeal for breaky and then just hung out on the couch with him all day. I did manage to finish the back of the pink and brown shell for the twin-set. I also got the sleeves for the lattice and lace cardigan. So, end of Sunday - not a bad day - lots of knitting, no sewing. Monday morning, got up with the dogs. While waiting for JB to get up - I work on a square for Hokie Healing - get all the way to row 38 in the pattern and drop a stitch, can't find the stitch, rip it out! JB got up, still feeling sickly. I go to make breakfast - I really wanted hashbrowns and eggs. Get frying pans out, grab ingredients, only 1 egg! DARN! Okay - plan B - I do not want oatmeal again. So, I make pancakes and cantaloupe. He tells the dogs we'll take them for a walk. Bad move, he's still dealing with a flu, but he got the dogs excited and I can't walk them by myself. So we walk the dogs - really short route, climbed a couple of big hills (it sure doesn't take long to lose any fitness progress that had been made) I was wheezing at the top of each hill. JB, however, was sweating to death - so we headed back home. I cast on for the hokie healing square again - made it to the same point when I lost the pattern, dropped a stitch and ripped it out again! So, I headed downstairs to work on the pink polka dot dress. The top is done - I did manage to do some hand stitching on it yesterday. So, now I just need to put the skirt together. Serger isn't working right. Had to rethread 3 times! Didn't clearly mark the top of the godets, so I now get to rip out all the panels and pin the godets in, so I can start over! I should have spent the day like Sharon! On the Weight Management front: I did not have cream in my coffee today. I did eat fruit with my breakfast and lightened up on the peanut butter and syrup (sugar free!). We walked the dogs, albeit slowly, I have been drinking my water and I actually plugged in a weight lifting video and did it!

Determination, Motivation, Stick-to-it-ivness

Lately I don't seem to have it. And frankly I don't think I care. Although I'm very disappointment in myself I don't have the drive or the desire to make the necessary changes. Let me start back at the beginning. For most of my adult life I have been somebody's version of overweight. I attended Weight Watchers meeting in Nebraska, Montana, Washington and even in England when we lived there. Truthfully though through my mid-20s I really wasn't overweight. I was busy - attending school full-time, working part-time and raising my two daughters alone. I worked out when I could and rode bikes with the girls. We were very active and tried to eat well - but sometimes it hard. After graduating from school and only having to work full-time, life slowed down and I enjoyed being able to sit down and watch tv, read a book, or (gasp) sew! I quit being so active. I had time. My life wasn't a constant rush. Then I met JB in May 1992. We were busy, I was always doing for somebody else. Getting up early so I could pack lunches for all the kids (his 2, my 2). Working all day, coming home cleaning house, cooking dinner, helping with homework, walking dogs - you know, normal 'mom/wife' stuff. I would fall into bed exhausted only to get up and do it again the next day. Sewing, reading, knitting, even mindless tv watching took a backseat to everyone else. I had put myself on the bottom of the foodchain. Finally (just like someone in an abusive relations) something snapped and I had enough. I joined Weight Watchers with a new attitude for the "last" time on January 10, 2002. That evening I weighed in at a whopping 254.6 pounds. I almost cried. I was so embarrassed. How had this happened? When did this happen. How was I going to lose 100#? Well I am a very slow loser. I enjoy having sweets - jelly beans are my own personal meth. Give me one and I'm a gonner! Really I'm that way with anything sweet. I just need to avoid it completely. Anyway - it took me until the first week in August 2002 to reach my 10% goal. For those of you good in math - that's only 25#. I set my personal goal for the very, very top end of the weight range for my height or 169. I reach lifetime on November 10, 2005. My entire family attended the meeting with me that night to show their love and support. I continued to attend regular weekly meeting for the next year and I have maintained my weight loss for some time. However, now I'm backsliding. I'm eating more sugar and less fruit. More chips and less veggies. I'm not thinking ahead and packing lunches as much and driving through fast food much more. I'm tired and not cooking again and we are ordering in more. I don't have the determination or motivation to get back to it. And yet, I am so disappointed in myself. I hate the way I feel when I try to find something to wear to work. I have a closet full of cute skirts that are starting to become unattractively too tight. I hate the feeling I get when I eat too much - sugar, salt, whatever. And yet, I don't seem to care enough to make the changes again. I don't want to wait until I need to lose 95# (my final weight loss number) again, but I'm afraid that's where I'm headed. Anyone have any stories to share? Any insight to give? How do you keep motivated? What gets on the treadmill (or your workout of choice) daily? Where does the determination, desire, drive to maintain weight management - even at the expense of other things in your life - come from? I don't have any answers and I'm about ready to go stand in front of the freezer with a spoon, eating ice cream straight from the carton. Sorry for the depressing, feeling sorry for myself, completely non-sewing related post - I guess I'm just looking for someone who can relate. I know there are a ton of bloggers out there following the weight watchers plan and being successful. I guess I'm looking for a support group (away from the weight watchers website) of woman who are crafty, taking care of others and can relate. Happy Weekend everyone.

It's Been About a Week

and I haven't updated. That's because I haven't been sewing. I haven't been doing alot of knitting. I haven't even really worked out or cooked or cleaned the house. So, what exactly have I been doing? Working! The office just bought me a laptop so I could work from home and next week our remote access is being set up. We recently got new client management software, as well as new billing software. We upgraded Windows and Office and man has that made my life harder this week!!! Please, no more changes intended to improve my life :) Also, did I mention that last week I had a horrible sore throat? Well that lasted about 4 days. Then it promptly moved into my head and chest, so, while I have still walked the dogs every day this week - I haven't done any of my other working out. The next goal is after 2 more consecutive weeks of morning dog walks and evening workouts - purchasing cotton lycra fabric and attempting to make some new tops. Right now, however, I have a pork roast in the oven cooking and I'm headed over to the sewing space to re-bond with my machine :) happy sewing everyone!

Do You?

Make your own workout clothing? Where do you find the fabric? Is it hard to work with? I realized on Saturday morning, that with my new schedule of working out - I'm always in workout clothes. I get up and put on my yoga pants, a t-shirt and my rain coat and head out of the house with JB to walk the dogs. That's what I'm wearing when he leaves for work. I do change and put on work clothes, but that's not what I'm wearing when he gets home. Most days by the time he gets home I'm already dressed in my afternoon workout wear and usually half-way through my workout. Right now I'm have long black yoga pants, some short dark grey yoga pants, a couple of tanks (that are pretty boring) and old oversized t-shirts. I figure if all he's ever going to see me in is workout wear maybe I could step it up a notch. So, can y'all help me out and tell me where to find the appropriate fabrics? For the record - after 2 weeks I'm down 6# and getting tired. When does the increase in energy from all this working out kick in? Did a tiny bit of sewing this weekend - finished up the apron for The Princess, got 2 more aprons cut out, but didn't sew a lick. I can't wait to get my real machine back. Went to JoAnn's and bought some magazines and mostly knit all weekend. I finished another baby hat, and have the yarn to start a few more. I also made progress on The Man Sweater - I have 4 rows until the armhold shaping on the back - for the second time! Right now I'm off to find lunch - what are you having?

Good Morning, Good Morning

Occasionally, I have to act as if. But not so much today. I am actually having a good morning :) I was too tired to get my weight lifting in this morning, but I did two full weight workouts this week, as well as 3 sessions on the treadmill, the dogs got walked every day :) Not too shabby. By the way - my WI this week finally showed a great loss (4.6#) and I am finally under goal again! Woo Hoo. This morning I am headed to the new home of one of our ASG members. We are having a party there! The meeting will still be held, however there will be food, too. This is new for us and I'm looking forward to it. Yesterday I made it to both JoAnns to get some solid fabric that will hopefully work with the apron as well as some really cute valentine's dog prints to make aprons for some friends. My goal is to get those in the mail by next weekend - February 5th at the latest. I also got to the local yarn store and got the correct size of Addis Turbo for The Man Sweater. I got it switched to the metal needle and away I went. I think I added between 2-3" to that puppy yesterday. And speaking of puppies - that was after bathing all 4 of them. Have you ever tried to wrestle a 110# dog into the tub who doesn't want to go? Maybe I did get some weight training after all :)

Feeling a Little Blah

First - look what I got for Christmas. JB really came through with this one. There is also a ball winder, but my table needs a minor adjustment before I can set it up, the table is currently too think to attach the winder. I also got the skein of red currently in residence on the winder. Next, remember that shopping spree I went on? Well the yarn on the left is the Cascade Quatro to make Lattice and Lace from the Summer 06 issue of Knitters Magazine. The body will be knit with the multi and then the cardi has a little ruffle around the button bands - which will be the solid. I previously swatched for this and then promptly forgot which needle size I liked. So, I need to restart it ~ but I'm afraid if I do, The Man Sweater will never get finished. The yarn on the right it for a twin set - the pattern is from Plymouth Yarns. I choose merino wool to make both pieces. The colors aren't very true in the photo. the main cardigan color is a rich chocolate brown and the pink for the contrast and the shell is more raspberry then the bright color shown. Finally, there is 3 skeins of KPPPM to make another Clapotis. This one will be for The Musical One. It will go lovely with her baby blue winter wool coat. I had hoped to get this one done by Christmas but since the yarn is still in skeins and not balls - it obviously didn't happen. However her birthday is in June and this would make a beautiful, light spring wrap. So, I'll just keep it in mind :)

Finishing up are some shots of things I've been working on. The photo on the left is an apron for The Princess. I loved the fabrics when I purchased them - but now the pink seems to be too much for the cute little blue print. What do you think? To me the pink is completely overpowering. I might need to go shopping for a softer pink to use as the ruffle and contrast on this apron.

The last picture is of the flower pincushions I made last Monday. Hope everyone else is having more productive days than I am. I think I might take one of them as a hostess gift to lady in my ASG Neighborhood Group who is opening her new home to our group for a meeting and potluck this Saturday.

On a completely unrelated front, I have however been working out and walking the dogs. We had a personal trainer come and visit on Saturday and man was he tough. And it was only "The Assessment." JB and I talked about it and we have decided to shake up my routine a little bit. He will start getting up at 5:30 with me and we will walk the dogs then. You don't really need to be awake to walk the dogs :) Then after work and before dinner we will do our workouts. I will do cardio on M,W,F and weight training on T,TH, & Sat. Sunday will be a day of rest with nothing more strenuous than walking the dogs, laundry, grocery shopping and hopefully some craft time. So far, I'm down 2# and moving in the right direction :) It feels good to have a commitment from him to do this with me - finally.

Jumbled Thoughts

After reading Shannon's post yesterday regarding sewing letting her be thinner, taller, whatever . . . I started thinking about why I sew. I don't really have an answer. I started sewing as a small child - when I was 8. When I was younger I mostly made things for others - for my brother, sister and my girls. I really enjoyed the process of making stuff for them. Going to the fabric store, finding the perfect pattern, the fabric that matched the vision and then creating that garment. I don't do that as much with my own clothes. I think that's totally fear based. I would much rather spend lots of money on garbage fabric from the local chain stores then ponying up for a good fabric. Good fabric scares the beezeesus out of me! Wool? Silk? Linen? So, that is one of my goals for this year - to purchase at least one fabric that I have never worked with before and make something. Instead of drooling on my monitor to actually purchase a piece of fabric that calls to me and then using it. It's just money and currently there are piles of it stacked in the storage cupboards in the sewing room - some was spent on "good" fabric. I have a piece of chocolate silk that I bought that will become a fabulous skirt. Due to the color the time is now - it's winter already! Perfect for a chocolate brown staight skirt with some detail. Okay - one plan. Second - I think I finally have my head back around my weight management plan. It's not as perfect as it was this summer, but it's getting there. I'm human after all and ocassionally I want a drink or a piece of cake. I don't have to eat the whole thing, but I can have the 3 bites that satisfy the craving. I got into the exercise room last night and man did it feel good. I did 3+ miles on the treadmill in 50 minutes, varying the speed and incline while I was at it. Then I went over to the M2 and set the weight stack and 40 and did 2 sets of 20 crunches. This morning I got up, got my workout ball out and plugged in a 45 minute workout video. I just jumped right in and used 8# weights. I'm sure I'll be really sore late this afternoon, but for now I'm doing good. Last plan is to get back to walking the dogs.

Posting - Just to Post?

Sorta, but not really. Although that's how I feel as I attempt to post every day in December. This is allegedly a sewing blog - although not much sewing is going on. Mostly knitting and some whinning. Well here's more whinning. Friday I bought a new pair of pants to wear to my office holiday dinner. My office is very informal - so technically to fit in, I should have bought a new pair of jeans. Anyway - here's where the whine comes in. My new pants? Size 12!! I'm incredibly distressed about this. The pants I bought last December - Size 8. I know I have vented about this before, but I still don't have the answer. Last year at this time I was easily maintaining my weight at 150# this year, 164# - that's quite a bit to put on during the year - especially if it continues. In another 3 years I'd be darn close to my pre-Weight Watchers weight and I don't want to do that. Just for the record - I'm 5'9" and I'm 43 years old. Also, I'm pretty wide. Having children spread my ribs and from the side I'm probably visually as wide as I am from the front - great! I'm a tall box, otherwise known as a rectangle with arms!! Here's the deal. In order to maintain a weight of 150# I need to work out 6 days a week for not less than 45 minutes per workout. Plus I have to walk dogs for roughly 75 minutes per day - 7 days a week. There is no fun in my food life, rarely a drink with dinner or dessert. Not a cookie, no chips or crackers, just fruits, veggies and lots of water. How important is it for me to maintain 150#. So, I'm curious, those of you who care about your shape - what do you do and why do you do it? What is "worth it" for you? Would you consider it as failure to increase your goal weight by a few (I'm not talking about the 14# currently attached) pounds to maintain a little less weight focused lifestyle? Happy holidays everyone - I hope to have sewing posts again soon. Tonight we are taking all 4 hounds to the mall to have their picture made with Santa :)